MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information
The Third Trimester - What To Expect
The last three months of pregnancy have begun. Within 90 days (estimated time of arrival) your baby will join you and your partner on the "outside." Your partner's body is making the final adjustments in getting ready for labor and your baby is beginning to mature in preparation for birth. You may have finally adjusted to "being pregnant" when a new flood of feelings arise within you as you get ready to welcome your baby to the world.
You have probably begun to wonder what you will be like as a father. What are the expectations of this new role as a parent? Reflecting on your father as a model may not fit how you see yourself as a dad. Fatherhood from generation to generation has changed significantly. The social and societal expectations for fathers, even twenty years ago, are quite different than today. Fathering and parenthood are not fixed roles. Dads roles are influenced by the society in the time when they live and the needs of each individual family.
Thinking about your own father and his parenting is a good place to start. What did you most enjoy about your father? What will you do different? Do you see any of your friends or family members who you feel are fathering the way you would like to? This last trimester is a good time to re-examine your relationship with work and think about how you may want to make adjustments both before and after the birth. Remember to allow yourself flexibility in your planning. No one can anticipate exactly what it will be like when their baby arrives, and the best made plans often need to adjust to circumstances and feelings you cannot be aware of before the baby has arrived.
Being involved in a prenatal class is a way to prepare yourself for the birth. More important, when you take a prenatal class with your partner you can begin prepare as a couple to share the birth experience. What will be your role doing birth? What are your partners expectations? Can you allow yourself to think about what you may need? Classes will give you the understanding of the stages of birth process and what to expect during labor and delivery.
The physical changes your partner has been going through will intensify during the last trimester. These physical changes will also have an effect on her psychological state. As men, there is nothing parallel for us as to the body hormonal changes a woman undergoes during pregnancy. The enthusiasm she may have experienced in the second trimester as the pregnancy was beginning "to show" does not guarantee she will feel the same way in the last month, when she has the full weight of the baby inside her. Expectant mothers can feel out of control of their bodies and this can be a very frightening experience.
You may feel some distress at your partners needs for increased help during the final month. No matter how much a couple can do in preparing for the birth of their baby, or getting their home ready for its arrival; there are always a few things that feel incomplete. Be patient with each other. Remember to keep the channels of communication open, neither of you can know exactly what birth and parenthood will be like. If you feel overwhelmed between work and getting ready for the baby, it would be wise to talk about this with your partner. Discuss your concerns and issues with the midwife when she comes to visit your partner at a prenatal. This is a good time to reach out for support. Other dads have gone through what you are experiencing. Friends, family, the dads in your prenatal class, other dads whom you may work with can all be sources of support for you.
Here are here are a few practical tips that pregnant dads have shared with me about the third trimester of pregnancy.
FOR YOUR WIFE / PARTNER:
- Get "the nest" ready together if possible. Work together getting things for your baby, such as baby furniture, getting the house ready, preparing extra meals.
- Find out how you can view at least two birth films together. Ask your midwife if she has any birth tapes you can borrow or if she knows where you can obtain them. Another option would be to watch some of the Birth TV shows on networks. Check your local TV listings.
- Let her know that you want to know what you can do to "be there" for her at the birth. Decide what level of participation you would like in the birth. If you are planning a birth at home, discuss your options and desires with your midwife. Most midwives are happy to allow you to "catch" or assisting her in "catching" or if simply want to be labor support and cut the cord afterwards.
- Help your partner to plan out healthy meals during the last part of her pregnancy and after the birth when she is breastfeeding the baby.
- Spend some special quality time with your partner before the baby arrives. Take her out for a romantic dinner and let her know how much you love her and appreciate her for everything she does and is going through during this special time. Keep those romantic fires burning brightly.
- If you are planning a homebirth, help her to gather supplies and prepare the home for the birth. If you are planning on a birth center or hospital delivery, go on a tour of where your baby will born.
- Begin to plan for the birth. Check and see how flexible your work will be both about time off for birth and after.
- Ask two new fathers about the their experience of their baby's births.
- Reach out to the men in your childbirth preparation class; see if you can have a dads-to-be night out.
- Find an exercise program that you feel you could continue after the baby is born. Make it one that your partner can join in with you after the baby arrives. She will want to lose some of her "baby weight" she gained during her pregnancy to regain her former body shape. It is something you both can do together.
- Go to a bookstore and look through the books on parenting, choose one for yourself. Talk with your midwife about recommended books or visual aids that may help you to learn about the process of birth and support the plans you and your partner have made about where and who you plan on assisting with the birth.
- Take time alone to reflect on your feelings about becoming a father. Share these feelings with your partner when alone and with your midwife.
Fatherhood is a wonderful, rewarding blessing. Enjoy it, embrace and treasure the experience.
HELPFUL RELATED LINKS
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information Index
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Pregnancy Survival Tips & Links
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Childbirth - Preparing For Labor & Delivery
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Childbirth Classes - Are They Necessary?
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Childbirth Classes - Types & Comparison
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Doula Care
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Effleurage
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor & Delivery
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor Initiation - Getting It Started
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor - Stage 1 (Dilation & Effacement)
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor - Stage 2 (Pushing & Birth)
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor - Stage 3 (Delivery of the Placenta)
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Labor - Stage 4 (Immediate Postpartum)
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Postpartum Care Index
Dad and newborn daughter bonding.
MEN & FATHERHOOD
My Favorite Internet Fatherhood Pictures
It takes more than a Man to be a Father! It takes love, commitment, sharing, duty to family, support (both financial and emotional), caring, discipline, and so much more! Love and take care of your children... they are the future and may someday have to take care of you.
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Circumcision Decision
PregnancyToday.com: Entering as a husband, exiting as a father.
PregnancyToday.com: How I knew I was a Dad
Fathering Magazine: Helpful Information About Fatherhood
National Fatherhood Initiative
The Fatherhood Project: A National Research & Education Program
About Fatherhood: Helpful Information About Fatherhood
ParentingHumor.com: Birthing Drugs For Dads
ParentingHumor.com: Daddy Dearest
Fatherville.com: Hey Doc, Can I Cut The Cord?
ParentingHumor.com: You know You're Ready to Be a Dad When...
ParentingHumor.com: Parenting, Kids, and Marriage
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Pregnant Fathers - 2 Trimester
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Pregnant Fathers - 3 Trimester
PregnancyToday.com: Prenatal Panic - One Father's View
Fatherhood by Bill Cosby
American Coalition for Fathers and Children (800) 978-3237 www.acfc.org At-Home Dad (508) 685-7931 AtHomeDad@aol.com Bay Area Male Involvement Project www.bamin.org Center on Fathers, Families and Public Policy (312) 341-0900 Children's Rights Council (202) 547-6227 www.crckids.org Families and Work Institute www.familiesandwork.org Fatherhood: Meeting The Challenge fatherhood.hhs.gov/guidance01/ch5.htm The Fatherhood Project/Families and Work Institute www.fatherhoodproject.org Fatherhood USA Video Materials www.familiesand work.org HandsNet www.handsnet.org Institute for Responsible Fatherhood & Family Revitalization www.responsiblefatherhood.org Men's Health Network www.menshealthnetwork.org National Center for Fathering (913) 384-4661 www.fathers.com National Center for Strategic Non-Profit Development & Community Leadership www.npcl.org National Center on Fathers & Families www.ncoff.gse.upenn.edu National Fatherhood Initiative (717) 581-8860 www.fatherhood.org National Fathers' Network (206) 747-4004 www.fathersnetwork.org National Partnership for Women & Families www.nationalpartnership.org National Practitioners Network for Fathers & Families (800) 343-7633 www.npcl.org
FATHERHOOD READING, HUMOR, & EDUCATION
NUTRITION DURING PREGNANCY
MoonDragon's Nutritional Guidelines Index
MoonDragon's Nutrition Information: Pregnancy Diet
MoonDragon's Nutrition Information: Folic Acid Facts
MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Nutrition Basics Index - Vitamins, Minerals & Supplement Information
MoonDragon's Womens Health Information: Anemia During Pregnancy
MoonDragon's Womens Health Information: Anemia - Folic Acid Deficiency
MoonDragon's Womens Health Information: Anemia - Iron Deficiency
ARTICLES TO READ
SIGNS & SYMPTOMS
Calculating Your Due Date
Hand Held Calculator
Common Pregnancy Symptoms
Morning Sickness, Homeopathic Tips
Hyperemesis Gravidarum - Conventional Treatment
Dizziness In Pregnancy
Breast Enlargement During Pregnancy
Pregnancy & Urinary Tract Infections
Pregnancy & Asthma
Pregnancy & Seizures
Pregnancy & Headaches
HEALTH & FITNESS
Nutrition During Pregnancy
Folic Acid During Pregnancy
Fatigue In Pregnancy
Getting Ready For Another Baby
Things To Avoid During Pregnancy
Dentistry During Pregnancy
Smoking During Pregnancy
Drugs During Pregnancy
Medications During Pregnancy
Weight Gain During Pregnancy
Pregnancy & Chronic Health Problems
Skin Care Tips During Pregnancy
INSPIRATION & FUN
Traveling During Pregnancy & With Kids
What Is A Midwife?
Living With A Pregnant Person
When Baby Makes Three
Male Bonding by Kellie Head
Things I Wish I knew Before Parenthood
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Calendar Index
Photos obtained from A Child Is Born by Lennart Nilsson
and Pregnancy - in anatomical illustrations by the Carnation Company
PREGNANCY RELATED LINKS
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information & Survival Tips
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information Index
MoonDragon's Pediatric Information Index
MoonDragon's Parenting Information Index
MoonDragon's Nutrition Information Index
AROMATHERAPY: ESSENTIAL OILS DESCRIPTIONS & USES
Allspice Leaf Oil Angelica Oil Anise Oil Baobab Oil Basil Oil Bay Laurel Oil Bay Oil Benzoin Oil Bergamot Oil Black Pepper Oil Chamomile (German) Oil Cajuput Oil Calamus Oil Camphor (White) Oil Caraway Oil Cardamom Oil Carrot Seed Oil Catnip Oil Cedarwood Oil Chamomile Oil Cinnamon Oil Citronella Oil Clary-Sage Oil Clove Oil Coriander Oil Cypress Oil Dill Oil Eucalyptus Oil Fennel Oil Fir Needle Oil Frankincense Oil Geranium Oil German Chamomile Oil Ginger Oil Grapefruit Oil Helichrysum Oil Hyssop Oil Iris-Root Oil Jasmine Oil Juniper Oil Labdanum Oil Lavender Oil Lemon-Balm Oil Lemongrass Oil Lemon Oil Lime Oil Longleaf-Pine Oil Mandarin Oil Marjoram Oil Mimosa Oil Myrrh Oil Myrtle Oil Neroli Oil Niaouli Oil Nutmeg Oil Orange Oil Oregano Oil Palmarosa Oil Patchouli Oil Peppermint Oil Peru-Balsam Oil Petitgrain Oil Pine-Long Leaf Oil Pine-Needle Oil Pine-Swiss Oil Rosemary Oil Rose Oil Rosewood Oil Sage Oil Sandalwood Oil Savory Oil Spearmint Oil Spikenard Oil Swiss-Pine Oil Tangerine Oil Tea-Tree Oil Thyme Oil Vanilla Oil Verbena Oil Vetiver Oil Violet Oil White-Camphor Oil Yarrow Oil Ylang-Ylang Oil Aromatherapy
Healing Baths For Colds
Using Essential Oils
AROMATHERAPY: HERBAL & CARRIER OILS DESCRIPTIONS & USES
Almond, Sweet Oil Apricot Kernel Oil Argan Oil Arnica Oil Avocado Oil Baobab Oil Black Cumin Oil Black Currant Oil Black Seed Oil Borage Seed Oil Calendula Oil Camelina Oil Castor Oil Coconut Oil Comfrey Oil Evening Primrose Oil Flaxseed Oil Grapeseed Oil Hazelnut Oil Hemp Seed Oil Jojoba Oil Kukui Nut Oil Macadamia Nut Oil Meadowfoam Seed Oil Mullein Oil Neem Oil Olive Oil Palm Oil Plantain Oil Plum Kernel Oil Poke Root Oil Pomegranate Seed Oil Pumpkin Seed Oil Rosehip Seed Oil Safflower Oil Sea Buckthorn Oil Sesame Seed Oil Shea Nut Oil Soybean Oil St. Johns Wort Oil Sunflower Oil Tamanu Oil Vitamin E Oil Wheat Germ Oil
HELPFUL RELATED MOONDRAGON NUTRITION BASICS LINKS
MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Amino Acids Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Antioxidants Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Enzymes Information MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Herbs Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Homeopathics Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Hydrosols Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Minerals Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Mineral Introduction MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Dietary & Cosmetic Supplements Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Dietary Supplements Introduction MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Specialty Supplements MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Vitamins Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Vitamins Introduction
NUTRITION BASICS ARTICLES
MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: 4 Basic Nutrients MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Avoid Foods That Contain Additives & Artificial Ingredients MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Is Aspartame A Safe Sugar Substitute? MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Guidelines For Selecting & Preparing Foods MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Foods That Destroy MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Foods That Heal MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: The Micronutrients: Vitamins & Minerals MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Avoid Overcooking Your Foods MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Phytochemicals MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Increase Your Consumption of Raw Produce MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Limit Your Use of Salt MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Use Proper Cooking Utensils MoonDragon's Nutrition Basics: Choosing The Best Water & Types of Water
RELATED MOONDRAGON HEALTH LINKS & INFORMATION
MoonDragon's Nutrition Information Index MoonDragon's Nutritional Therapy Index MoonDragon's Nutritional Analysis Index MoonDragon's Nutritional Diet Index MoonDragon's Nutritional Recipe Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Therapy: Preparing Produce for Juicing MoonDragon's Nutrition Information: Food Additives Index MoonDragon's Nutrition Information: Food Safety Links MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Index MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Articles MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Back Pain MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Labor & Birth MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Blending Chart MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Essential Oil Details MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Links MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Miscarriage MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Post Partum MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Childbearing MoonDragon's Aromatherapy For Problems in Pregnancy & Birthing MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Chart of Essential Oils #1 MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Chart of Essential Oils #2 MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Tips MoonDragon's Aromatherapy Uses MoonDragon's Alternative Health Index MoonDragon's Alternative Health Information Overview MoonDragon's Alternative Health Therapy Index MoonDragon's Alternative Health: Touch & Movement Therapies Index MoonDragon's Alternative Health Therapy: Touch & Movement: Aromatherapy MoonDragon's Alternative Therapy: Touch & Movement - Massage Therapy MoonDragon's Alternative Health: Therapeutic Massage MoonDragon's Holistic Health Links Page 1 MoonDragon's Holistic Health Links Page 2 MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Nutrition Basics Index MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Therapy Index MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Massage Therapy MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Hydrotherapy MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Pain Control Therapy MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Relaxation Therapy MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Steam Inhalation Therapy MoonDragon's Health & Wellness: Therapy - Herbal Oils Index
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