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MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information
The Second Trimester - What To Expect

pregnant father listening to baby

In the second trimester you will have a chance to hear your baby's heartbeat and possibly see your baby through ultra sound. These experiences usually bring a heightened sense of reality... we are really going to have a baby!

In our society we tend to value men's financial contributions to our families more than our emotional contributions. It is understandable then why concerns over money or financial security become the focus of many expectant fathers. It may also become an acceptable "male" way of expressing concern for your partner and unborn child. It is usual to begin to think about how your finance will be changed by having a baby, but if you become preoccupied with money concerns, something deeper may be troubling you. If you feel that dealing with "money" is all your responsibility it may be touching on deeper issues of competency or security. It is important in this second trimester to discuss your finances with your partner but also to keep them in perspective. Developing a little "tolerance for uncertainty" is a useful skill both in pregnancy and parenthood.

Many expectant dads report that during the second trimester there is a change in the sexuality with their partners. Each expectant mom will respond differently to the hormonal changes her body is going through. For some women it pregnancy can intensify their sexual arousal, while for others it appears to diminish it. As a father-to-be it is important to see that in this second trimester many of your partner's responses may be driven by the changes her body and hormones are putting her through. At this point in the pregnancy you may begin to feel concerned about how your relationship with your partner is fluctuating. You may begin to notice how the routines you have taken for granted are changing. Couples often share basic routines around meals, leisure time and household chores. A simple habit, like a Sunday morning breakfast may no longer be desirable to your partner if she has morning sickness. If you both use to enjoy going out weekend evenings and now she feels too fatigued, how are you going to respond? You may feel disappointed to discover the partner you felt you knew and understood and depended on is no longer herself. Every couple experiences these changes differently. Try and talk with your partner about the changes your feel the relationship is going. Try and be understanding with each other about all the happiness, guilt, anticipation, ambivalence and frustration that is now going on in your lives. Establishing a pattern of "open communication" with your partner at this time in the pregnancy will allow the both of you to move toward the birth in a more supportive and positive relationship.

becoming a father... looking at ultrasound pictures together

Here are here are a few practical tips that pregnant dads have shared with me during the 2nd trimester of pregnancy.

  • Start to take-on more of the chores around your house or apartment.
  • Let your partner know she is going to be a great mom.
  • Let her know that you and her can talk about both the positive and negatives about being pregnant.
  • Talk about how your lives can slow down, how you can both do less in the coming months and enjoy the pregnancy.
  • If you have not done so yet, discuss with her about the birth plans she wants and your participation during the birth of your baby. If you want to do only labor support, cut the baby's cord, or if you want to help your midwife "catch" the baby, share this with her and discuss it with your midwife. Help her design her birth plan to include what you want from the birth experience.

  • Talk with two other new fathers about how they are feeling as parents.
  • If possible, ask your father what it was like for him when you were born.
  • Go for a walk with a friend who will listen to you talk about how you feel about being a "pregnant" dad.
  • Go to a bookstore and look through the books on parenting, choose one for yourself. Talk with your midwife about recommended books or visual aids that may help you to learn about the process of birth and support the plans you and your partner have made about where and who you plan on assisting with the birth.
  • Take time alone to reflect on your feelings about becoming a father. Share these feelings with your partner when alone and with your midwife.

Fatherhood is a wonderful, rewarding blessing. Enjoy it, embrace and treasure the experience.


My Favorite Internet Fatherhood Pictures


It takes more than a Man to be a Father! It takes love, commitment, sharing, duty to family, support (both financial and emotional), caring, discipline, and so much more! Love and take care of your children... they are the future and may someday have to take care of you.

MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Circumcision Decision Entering as a husband, exiting as a father. How I knew I was a Dad
Fathering Magazine: Helpful Information About Fatherhood
National Fatherhood Initiative
The Fatherhood Project: A National Research & Education Program
About Fatherhood: Helpful Information About Fatherhood Birthing Drugs For Dads Daddy Dearest Hey Doc, Can I Cut The Cord? You know You're Ready to Be a Dad When... Parenting, Kids, and Marriage
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Pregnant Fathers - 2 Trimester
MoonDragon's Pregnancy Information: Pregnant Fathers - 3 Trimester Prenatal Panic - One Father's View
Fatherhood by Bill Cosby


  • American Coalition for Fathers and Children (800) 978-3237
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  • Bay Area Male Involvement Project
  • Center on Fathers, Families and Public Policy (312) 341-0900
  • Children's Rights Council (202) 547-6227
  • Families and Work Institute
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  • The Fatherhood Project/Families and Work Institute
  • Fatherhood USA Video Materials www.familiesand
  • HandsNet
  • Institute for Responsible Fatherhood & Family Revitalization
  • Men's Health Network
  • National Center for Fathering (913) 384-4661
  • National Center for Strategic Non-Profit Development & Community Leadership
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  • National Partnership for Women & Families
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